I told my therapist this last week when we were discussing my fear that I am not in the best academic environment. She asked what the worst case scenario would be if in fact I missed out on some possible education and what I described above was my response. She was trying to juxtapose the fear with the most negative possible outcome by asking that question. This technique probably has greater effect when the root fear is more rational but for me, and I suspect many others, it comes down to a ridiculous fear that I won't look cool in every possible situation.
Something that I write and think about often is the concept of rakishness and I wonder if true rakes ever live with this schema of unrelenting standards. Are rakes conscious of their rakishness? Do they compare themselves to other rakes? I would like to think that a quality of rakishness is a transcendence of competition and need for comparison. I doubt that if one could magically find themselves in the company of both Marquis de Sade and Oscar Wilde (two almost perfect examples of the rake in history) that either would be in the least bit concerned with a comparison to the other. I'm sure you might find a competition in some form but no concern for a hierarchy based simply on rakishness as a concept or from a technical aspect. Rakes aren't 80s metal guitar players trying to beat each other at metronome games.
But that's exactly how I would approach it in my increasingly neurotic world; and I would miss the whole point by doing such and giving into the schema.
Good blog. First off though, you could never find yourself "magically" in the presence of Marquis de Sade and Oscar Wilde. It might be possible, however, auto-magically and thus much more concievable. I feel that if I did land in such an intense situation my first thought would be not at all of a competition or hierarchy between the two but more honestly to grab my Blackberry and update my facebook status. This would initiate the response of the 2 facebook friends I have that would even know who Marquis de Sade and Oscar Wilde are (you and Jim Abney). After that I would transition to the next most important detail. What kind of cigarettes do they smoke?? Wilde im guessing reds in a box....strong, standard, A mans cig. De Sade however...?? Jesus who knows? Something extremely long and exotic. Perfect to burn whatever underage royalty he could find to assualt. At any rate, I guess my point is that true rakes arent competing at all, I dont think. As a matter of fact, I bet they dont even know what a rake is. Thats a label by definition and I would think rakes abhor labels of any kind. My friend we may or may not be rakish....but I feel that your quest for being cooler than everyone else isnt one for rakism at all. I think the term elitist fits it a little better. Only one thing to say about elitists though.... they think that they are better than everyone else and, well, thats rakish as hell.
ReplyDeletei wish you were as cool as me
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